HI! it's me, the owner of your favorite blog, or only blog, or maybe you dont care at all your just reading to satisfy my over zealous need for attention. What ever your reason it doesn't matter. I haven't posted every day, been to busy, life's complicated. I do have a life outside of the internet. However most of you probably dont believe that statement -.- but it is true.
anyway i'm thinking of posting three times a week now, Mondays defiantly. Everyone needs something fun on a Monday and its where im at my most random, and possibly most sarcastic. Other days would probably include Wednesday and Friday, maybe Saturday. I love you all and I hope you love me *Shrieks and begs for attention.*
SO interesting things that have been consuming my mind? Fun ideas that you can try at home? Cosmic answers that have arrived at my door step? (what is it with me and cosmic situation?) anyway yes yes and no, but still trying.
First off YOUTUBE! yeah i know, im a little late on this band wagon, but eh what can you do. So i have finally discovered some of the best things on youtube. and while most of you are like "We are on it all the time, or thats so last year" SHUTUP! this is my moment to talk... or write. First things first, Philip defranko, News and entertainment blog, i watch every episode and he has kept me up to date on not only whats in the news but of new models and fun gadgets. And he is just as sarcastic as me, we are so fun loving i can hardly stand being ME! but i do it anyway. i mean lets face it could anyone else handle two over zealous attention whores named Jace? i didnt think so.
second thing on youtube is a little weird. found her recently in a music video about Star Trek, now tell me what do you get when you take a scifi fanatic fan base, take a really cute teenage girl, and write a song about love in the stars? about a million views and a new fan club. but its not bad, its actually funny to see how much this girl knows about star trek and how much she really is a nerd over it. So all you nerd and geeks of Star Trek, there is still hope for you, you can still get a geeky girl that look like a goddess, just loose a few pounds and the glasses. HEY i'm here to help ok dont get so upset! anyway other things she does is sing in JAPANESE! i'm sold, this girl is amazing. Maybe ill meet her when im in CALI, maybe not just a thought. If you want to check out here stuff BAM! MEEKAKITTY thats her screen name and where everything is posted. And while your there look up the song DONT UPLUG ME. great computer humor. which is actually done by a band called "All caps" so check out what you want.
What else? IT IS SATURDAY! and no one has talked to me at all today, well OK so my true friends have, so if you didnt text me SHAME ON YOU! (Can you tell i'm a little hyper) its a little crazy, i was told i was being weird, which is true, and it is weird. as weird as if Parris Hiltion ever became a psychologist... LORD SAFE US ALL! and he shall, unless your a apple user than im sorry, satan made that... you just go to hell.. JK JK i kidd the retards, but seriously, Satan can never make anything right. God created the bible, Satan says "I can do that too" and he creates the Qur'an. Just not the same *shakes head in shame* just not the same. OK away from the horribly unfunny jokes and bad humor, unless you find that funny than shame on you too, but no seriously it was funny laugh. LAUGH!
In other news Valentines day is coming up, and i might post on Monday, but if i don't then this will be my V-day post. You never know i might be busy, with a girl, on a date.... *shakes head* no in wont, BUT! if i do then yeah i wont be posting. so V-day, and all you guys are going WHAT DO I GET HER!?!? and thats why you come to me. Okay lets be honest if you are coming to me for valentines day ideas then you buddy have hit your all time low, I've been single for three years, has it been three years? oh my gosh it has.... *cries in a corner* but if you do seek advice from me on this matter, dont get her a card! nor chocolates. that stuff is so overrated and dull. roses however are always a must, girls love flowers, and leafs, but that's another story. What you should do is do something special. something WOW, or SURPRISING! see girls love it when you show them you care, and what better way to show you care then to put some effort into Valentines day. Take her out to eat at a nice restaurant. then take a walk in the moonlight through some park, after shes all tired from the talking and kissing and walking. Sit her down on a bench and give her a nice massage. After all this then pull out what ever gift you bought and give it to her. Not only did you make her day with all that came before but you also gave her a memento to remember the night by. and it doesnt have to be something fancy just a little something to help her remember you love her, because lets face it just because we say it EVERYDAY does not mean it counts as much as a gift on V-day.
Thats all i have for you today, i didnt get around to talking about my book but i will sometime in the short future, sorry. However got anything else you want me to add to that list put it in the comment box and ill see what i can do. Here however is an assignment, Get one friend to read and follow me on my blog. "Jace what will this accomplish for me?" you ask. Well it will fuel my over growing demand for attention and make you feel like a real friend *cheesy yet awesome smile*
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Thursday, February 10, 2011
NO BARBIES! (Willow Wisps Chorus)
Hello friends, what do you think of my new format? Let me know what you think. If you have any ideas on templates or ways to make this place look more friendly and or awesome let me know. i'm always taking suggestions and ideas. Which brings me to another question. If you guys have a topic or idea you want me to write about leave it in the comment section below, I always enjoy writing about what subjects people want to read, and tearing it apart and making fun of it on some occasions. I do have to put a warning, if you ask me to write about barbie or who i think will win "The next top model" you wont get a serious blog, you will get something like this:
Barbies, are in nature evil and satanic creatures made of plastic. I would never let my kids play with them, not because dolls terrify me to death (and they do), but because their head spins 360 degrees without losing their smile, their bodies are so fake and perfect that the only real human you can see with such a figure is in Hollywood full of more plastic than it takes to make hundreds of barbies, ah yes Hollywood the only place in America that has more silicon then silicon Vally. But seeing as both of them are in Californian I'm beginning to wonder if the rest of the world has enough silicon or that they just stole it all.
so there no barbies. Anyway please give your opinions and your ideas. another thing i ask is that when you see a poll (and there will be many of them) please vote, I want to make them fun and i want to see everyone response and put them in my blog. so the more you participate the more i can make fun or talk about you :). Love you all.
So a few of you asked me to post this up there, i actually know it by heart now. One of those things I just wrote and then never forgot:
Barbies, are in nature evil and satanic creatures made of plastic. I would never let my kids play with them, not because dolls terrify me to death (and they do), but because their head spins 360 degrees without losing their smile, their bodies are so fake and perfect that the only real human you can see with such a figure is in Hollywood full of more plastic than it takes to make hundreds of barbies, ah yes Hollywood the only place in America that has more silicon then silicon Vally. But seeing as both of them are in Californian I'm beginning to wonder if the rest of the world has enough silicon or that they just stole it all.
so there no barbies. Anyway please give your opinions and your ideas. another thing i ask is that when you see a poll (and there will be many of them) please vote, I want to make them fun and i want to see everyone response and put them in my blog. so the more you participate the more i can make fun or talk about you :). Love you all.
So a few of you asked me to post this up there, i actually know it by heart now. One of those things I just wrote and then never forgot:
When the night grows long
and the willow wisps song
spills out among the skies.
You will find me in my home
among the trees and woodland comb
sitting on the grass grown stumps.
Take to heart the sight you see
and remember it forever be
the scene which the willows sing.
And take your seat among the hills
all the children who seek the thrills
of the willow wisp chorus.
and the willow wisps song
spills out among the skies.
You will find me in my home
among the trees and woodland comb
sitting on the grass grown stumps.
Take to heart the sight you see
and remember it forever be
the scene which the willows sing.
And take your seat among the hills
all the children who seek the thrills
of the willow wisp chorus.
And there you go, hope you enjoy it. I did and it helped a lot. Ever get to that point where you just cant go on, and feel as if there is no place that you can rest. I find quoting this poem helps.
Friday, February 4, 2011
Internetz, we all has it
It is Friday at one in the morning....
Why write this late? maybe because i have a strong connection to the moon, or maybe its because at night everything lines up and my brain connects with the universe and tells me wonderful life changing things. Or maybe because i can't sleep and i'm bored. (im going with the first two options.) anyway not what i am wanting to say, its just a side note. something i do a lot, and will do a l----hey look a quarter! anyway?
OH YES. GOD SAVE US ALL FROM STUPID PEOPLE! and when i say stupid people i don't mean people that dress up in tutus at walmart (even though they are eighty five years old) or the people who wear their pants around their ankles, or even the grown men with no teeth spitting tobacco drinking beer and doing death defying tricks off their roof.... no no what stupid people im talking about is the rich, the people with pull, and oh yes GOVERNMENT. (i think there was a joke there, im not sure) let me speak for a moment, even though no one cares. I dont claim to know much about politics, nor do i care to know about them, but with everything that's going on in this world i have to stop for a moment and go WHOA WHOA WHOA!!! did that really just happen?
since january twenty fifth, Egypt has been protesting their government and their president. It has gotten so bad that hundreds of thousands of people have been marching in the streets. Why haven't you heard of this? maybe you just don't care, maybe its that you don't watch T.V. BUT! it could be to the fact that Egypt TURNED OFF THE INTERNET! still doesnt give you an excuse but i will work with you. What has been happening is that the Egyptian people have been protesting against the president. He at one point fled the country and then once that did not work fired or laid off the entire government staff. He apparently thinks the people are mad at the political people he put in office, not him. But he has agreed not to run for office again which is another seven months from now. The Egyptians didn't seem to like this and so they are still marching. so if anyone wants to be supportive take to the streets and "walk like an Egyptian." (if you didnt get that joke you my friend missed the 80's)
In other political news Canada has limited bandwidth to 75 gigs a month. After exceeding the limit they have begun to charge five dollars a gig! now for all you non geeks out there you are probably going "Ummm so?" NO! this is very important! 75 gigs a month? i go through that in a week if not more, way more! this isnt per person but per router! which means if you have more than two computers in a house you would end up using over 75 in a week. Now tell me if Canada can do this, and i will admit Canada is a little messed up, what is stopping our Government from doing the same? whats worse? Our Government is talking about putting an "on off" switch to our countries internet! what is their reasoning? "Cyber terrorism" COME ON OBAMA! you really going to think im going to believe that? Its because they are afraid of the same thing in Egypt, if we put one toe out of line all they have to do is shut down the internet. now for all you facebook nuts and youtube cravers this would destory you. but to geeks around the country, it would destroy their very existence, their way of life, and it would cut all contact with most of the nation. we would be lost in a stupor of confusion! how to remedy this? We all buy carrier pidgins! you tell me "Ah.. Jace? we do have cell phones..." and i would agree.... but iv always wanted a pidgin to send letters with and this is a great situation to bring them back.
On a completely different and less political note this is the third snow day. and when i say snow day i mean their is snow on the ground, not that im off work. Because lets face it i'm rarely off work. and while it was supposed to be melting their shall be more snow. yes i said it more snow! it comes in tomorrow, and while its supposed to be light flurries and such, it is also supposed to hit monday... and tuesday... and possibly wednesday. Tell me did Oklahoma open a portal some where? as much as we believe this place is connected to Hell at least their its warm, here we have tapped into a unbelievable cash cow of snow... now if only i can make my car run on this stuff. But i will be at work tomorrow and saturday, and monday, and tuesday. so the only silver lining i can find in this is i'm getting paid, and i need money. So i will smile, grin and bare it.
i will leave everyone with this thought: if you are going to attempt my boiling water in the air stunt i talked about last post, make sure of two things; one! that its boiling, warm water does nothing but cause a mess; and TWO! THROW THE WATER AWAY FROM YOU! My uncle found a video on youtube of someone doing this very same trick, filled a pan of warm water straight from the tap and threw it up in the air, apparently he threw it straight up and gravity took over. Drenched himself from head to toe which then began to instantly freeze all over him. so be careful.
Why write this late? maybe because i have a strong connection to the moon, or maybe its because at night everything lines up and my brain connects with the universe and tells me wonderful life changing things. Or maybe because i can't sleep and i'm bored. (im going with the first two options.) anyway not what i am wanting to say, its just a side note. something i do a lot, and will do a l----hey look a quarter! anyway?
OH YES. GOD SAVE US ALL FROM STUPID PEOPLE! and when i say stupid people i don't mean people that dress up in tutus at walmart (even though they are eighty five years old) or the people who wear their pants around their ankles, or even the grown men with no teeth spitting tobacco drinking beer and doing death defying tricks off their roof.... no no what stupid people im talking about is the rich, the people with pull, and oh yes GOVERNMENT. (i think there was a joke there, im not sure) let me speak for a moment, even though no one cares. I dont claim to know much about politics, nor do i care to know about them, but with everything that's going on in this world i have to stop for a moment and go WHOA WHOA WHOA!!! did that really just happen?
since january twenty fifth, Egypt has been protesting their government and their president. It has gotten so bad that hundreds of thousands of people have been marching in the streets. Why haven't you heard of this? maybe you just don't care, maybe its that you don't watch T.V. BUT! it could be to the fact that Egypt TURNED OFF THE INTERNET! still doesnt give you an excuse but i will work with you. What has been happening is that the Egyptian people have been protesting against the president. He at one point fled the country and then once that did not work fired or laid off the entire government staff. He apparently thinks the people are mad at the political people he put in office, not him. But he has agreed not to run for office again which is another seven months from now. The Egyptians didn't seem to like this and so they are still marching. so if anyone wants to be supportive take to the streets and "walk like an Egyptian." (if you didnt get that joke you my friend missed the 80's)
In other political news Canada has limited bandwidth to 75 gigs a month. After exceeding the limit they have begun to charge five dollars a gig! now for all you non geeks out there you are probably going "Ummm so?" NO! this is very important! 75 gigs a month? i go through that in a week if not more, way more! this isnt per person but per router! which means if you have more than two computers in a house you would end up using over 75 in a week. Now tell me if Canada can do this, and i will admit Canada is a little messed up, what is stopping our Government from doing the same? whats worse? Our Government is talking about putting an "on off" switch to our countries internet! what is their reasoning? "Cyber terrorism" COME ON OBAMA! you really going to think im going to believe that? Its because they are afraid of the same thing in Egypt, if we put one toe out of line all they have to do is shut down the internet. now for all you facebook nuts and youtube cravers this would destory you. but to geeks around the country, it would destroy their very existence, their way of life, and it would cut all contact with most of the nation. we would be lost in a stupor of confusion! how to remedy this? We all buy carrier pidgins! you tell me "Ah.. Jace? we do have cell phones..." and i would agree.... but iv always wanted a pidgin to send letters with and this is a great situation to bring them back.
On a completely different and less political note this is the third snow day. and when i say snow day i mean their is snow on the ground, not that im off work. Because lets face it i'm rarely off work. and while it was supposed to be melting their shall be more snow. yes i said it more snow! it comes in tomorrow, and while its supposed to be light flurries and such, it is also supposed to hit monday... and tuesday... and possibly wednesday. Tell me did Oklahoma open a portal some where? as much as we believe this place is connected to Hell at least their its warm, here we have tapped into a unbelievable cash cow of snow... now if only i can make my car run on this stuff. But i will be at work tomorrow and saturday, and monday, and tuesday. so the only silver lining i can find in this is i'm getting paid, and i need money. So i will smile, grin and bare it.
i will leave everyone with this thought: if you are going to attempt my boiling water in the air stunt i talked about last post, make sure of two things; one! that its boiling, warm water does nothing but cause a mess; and TWO! THROW THE WATER AWAY FROM YOU! My uncle found a video on youtube of someone doing this very same trick, filled a pan of warm water straight from the tap and threw it up in the air, apparently he threw it straight up and gravity took over. Drenched himself from head to toe which then began to instantly freeze all over him. so be careful.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Pizza Rolls are the key to freedom
Day two of the Blizzard....
I woke at nine this morning, more to the fact that my alarm went off in my ear then actually wanting too. I was supposed to be at work today, and yes Reynolds Ford was opened, however i called Zak to see if i was needed. He answered and explained that if i could get over the ten feet snow drifts and make it through the parking lot without falling into a quicksand of snow, then he would meet me on the other end of the building and allow me to clock in. I thought for a few minutes as i laid my head back down on my pillow and came to a brilliant conclusion. Today is my day off. (which it was but my boss told me to make it there at ten) So i told Zak i wont be making it to work today and curled back up into my nice warm bed. Let him freeze to death in the body shop with nothing to do.
I woke again around eleven thirty with Chris rummaging through some stuff. I had forgotten tomorrow he leaves for his ski trip. I was quite sure, and i know this sounds ironic, that they had been snowed out of it... but no. So the only entertainment i was going to have was now leaving Today to start his long drive to Colorado. Well i see it this way, if hes gone all i have to do is get rid of Rion and i can have the place to myself.
Seeing as rent was due yesterday i decided to actually get my butt out of bed and try to make it the block to seven-eleven to get some money orders. Dragging Chris along we both got into my car and off we went. For clarification Chris held onto the safety handles the entire time while i floored the car and swerved all over the road! Now i hate driving, its boring its annoying and you cant do anything. BUT! when there is ice and snow on the road, my car becomes the only amusement park ride I enjoy, and at the expense of everyone else in the car, I make the most of it! So as i'm smiling away driving Chris is turning catholic and quoting the rosary.
after getting the money i realize i'm hungry, and that due to yesterdays blizzard and no money to begin with, we are out of food in the house. I got a gift card to Wal-mart and decided now was the best time to pick up some food for one day. what did i get? fifty dollars of PIZZA ROLLS! yes pizza rolls will set you free! they are so delicious and tasty and make me so happy :))) <------ this is me smiling from ear to ear (or a smile with two chins.. never actually knew what it meant)
Now for a relaxing day of video games, junk food, and if Rion sleeps all day, time to myself. Which should be very enjoyable.
I do however want to point out for those of you who are beginning to wonder if all im going to do is complain or write every little detail about my day down onto the internet like some over zealous pompous prick who thinks everyone cares what he did fifteen minuets ago while in the bathroom, the answer is NO! I'm just bored and the snow has given me little to write about.
I will however leave you with this mind blowing comment: Warm water freezes quicker than cold water, the reason being is because the molecules in the warm water are bouncing around faster than in the cold water, as the warm water molecules frantically bounce around they expel mass amounts of heat and freeze, while the cold water molecules are moving slower and their for to not lose heat as fast. want to try it out? fill a bucket of boiling water and throw it into the air outside, it turns to snow, throw a bucket of cold water in the air outside, it melts the ice.
I woke at nine this morning, more to the fact that my alarm went off in my ear then actually wanting too. I was supposed to be at work today, and yes Reynolds Ford was opened, however i called Zak to see if i was needed. He answered and explained that if i could get over the ten feet snow drifts and make it through the parking lot without falling into a quicksand of snow, then he would meet me on the other end of the building and allow me to clock in. I thought for a few minutes as i laid my head back down on my pillow and came to a brilliant conclusion. Today is my day off. (which it was but my boss told me to make it there at ten) So i told Zak i wont be making it to work today and curled back up into my nice warm bed. Let him freeze to death in the body shop with nothing to do.
I woke again around eleven thirty with Chris rummaging through some stuff. I had forgotten tomorrow he leaves for his ski trip. I was quite sure, and i know this sounds ironic, that they had been snowed out of it... but no. So the only entertainment i was going to have was now leaving Today to start his long drive to Colorado. Well i see it this way, if hes gone all i have to do is get rid of Rion and i can have the place to myself.
Seeing as rent was due yesterday i decided to actually get my butt out of bed and try to make it the block to seven-eleven to get some money orders. Dragging Chris along we both got into my car and off we went. For clarification Chris held onto the safety handles the entire time while i floored the car and swerved all over the road! Now i hate driving, its boring its annoying and you cant do anything. BUT! when there is ice and snow on the road, my car becomes the only amusement park ride I enjoy, and at the expense of everyone else in the car, I make the most of it! So as i'm smiling away driving Chris is turning catholic and quoting the rosary.
after getting the money i realize i'm hungry, and that due to yesterdays blizzard and no money to begin with, we are out of food in the house. I got a gift card to Wal-mart and decided now was the best time to pick up some food for one day. what did i get? fifty dollars of PIZZA ROLLS! yes pizza rolls will set you free! they are so delicious and tasty and make me so happy :))) <------ this is me smiling from ear to ear (or a smile with two chins.. never actually knew what it meant)
Now for a relaxing day of video games, junk food, and if Rion sleeps all day, time to myself. Which should be very enjoyable.
I do however want to point out for those of you who are beginning to wonder if all im going to do is complain or write every little detail about my day down onto the internet like some over zealous pompous prick who thinks everyone cares what he did fifteen minuets ago while in the bathroom, the answer is NO! I'm just bored and the snow has given me little to write about.
I will however leave you with this mind blowing comment: Warm water freezes quicker than cold water, the reason being is because the molecules in the warm water are bouncing around faster than in the cold water, as the warm water molecules frantically bounce around they expel mass amounts of heat and freeze, while the cold water molecules are moving slower and their for to not lose heat as fast. want to try it out? fill a bucket of boiling water and throw it into the air outside, it turns to snow, throw a bucket of cold water in the air outside, it melts the ice.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)